The Axalon is over 15 years old now. All I have to say is, “wow”.

It has been an amazing adventure with a lot of twists, turns and rants.

Especially rants.

There isn’t a day that goes by that there is something I observe that I could easily twist into a rant and go back at it full force. I usually jot these ideas into one of my phone’s several notebooks for reference later. There isn’t much in the way of how this site works. It works as it has always worked. Yes it is more streamlines and looks more…”professional” or “adult” as my younger brother pointed out when the site turned 10 years old, but that doesn’t change the fact that it has always revolved around some sort of adolescent angst that some how seemingly still thrives in all of us.

I’ve developed quite a decent following over the years. I ask myself if it matters how many people like it. A humble person would be all “No. I would still be doing it.” Me? I’m like, “Well fuck yes! Give me more people to quite possibly fucking offend.”


Well…that and I would still be doing it myself because to me it is quite entertaining and I crack myself up.

Why do I do this?

The answer is simple. Because I can.

Why the website?

Because I can.

Why did I make fun of midgets dressed as the lead from the botched play for Spider-Man?

Because I can…and because they fucked up one of my favorite Marvel characters. Plus he owes me money. Come on, Dan. If you’re reading this. Pay up!

In closing, I would like to say thank you for staying a constant reader throughout the years…and if you know Dan Brightlen, kick him in the shin and tell him to pay Smalley his money. You may have to crouch down to do it…but it will be satisfying.

Chapter One “The Inflated Sense of Self-Worth”

Posted by on May 2, 2017 in Articles | 0 comments

I’ll set the scene. It’s a familiar one. One we’ve all been in numerous times. Lines. We all hate waiting in lines, yet they’re everywhere. I have a theory that once you enter the line, time slows down quite a bit. How much? Well it depends on external factors such as if you’ve got to use the restroom, are sick, have a cranky child, someone else in line has a cranky child, number of items in your purchase, etc. So there I was, waiting in a pharmacy line to pick up some much needed medication for a sinus...

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